This is the day I return to Los Angeles. The thought makes me very sad. But in the true tradition of my recent health, I still feel sick to my stomach so it is appropriate. How I would love to be healthy again!

I just returned from early morning prayer. It was utterly blissful. I don’t believe there is any more peaceful place than the sanctuary of that church at 6 a.m. I almost missed it. As tired as I was, I woke up at five and fell back asleep. At 5:45—out of dreams of day labor and lost jobs in LA—I awoke, shocked. I did not know I could take a shower and be out the shower as fast as I was, but when I arrived Martha had not even finished making the coffee in the back. And then I sat down and all the old feelings settled over me. It could have been any 6 a.m. on any day in East Texas. It felt so familiar in all the right ways. There was Pastor Jerry on his face up front, Martha in her place. At first no one else was there. Oh if only those people KNEW what they were missing—but that is my theme lately. One person came late, but that was it. I liked it though—more quiet. I basked in it. I read my Bible and it was more alive to me than usual in that quiet place. It felt so good—all of it was so wonderful. And then I cried. I am sure I don’t have to explain why.

We visited some afterwards, Pastor and Martha and me. Pastor said “So, you have gotten all settled in there?” And I made my usual “it is a wild place” comment—he is a very smart man and took the hint—we will save that for later! It was nice to sit and visit with them, though. It was nice to be home.

Well, I am headed out to the nature trail. It is very cool here this morning. I am not used to being cold anymore. I remember complaining fiercely about the plethora of rain early this year. Now I must say it would be nice to see some variety. Goodness, the daily sun and haze is getting old. I haven’t seen a raindrop in three months. I find that interesting as well. Ever since I have started traveling I have seen rain on EVERY trip I have taken—I don’t mean bad rain that ruined the trip—I mean just some rain and it is usually nice—and it never ruined a trip even when it was inconvenient. But I have been in California for almost three months—a whole season—and not seen any rain.

Symbolically that says a lot even though it is a sign for nothing.

Just a few hours til I get to talk to Pastor Jerry—That is my only hope to not come home sobbing.