If what I heard at work today is typical Jesus could be a long way from coming back. We all know that the Gospel must be preached to all nations, but I think we forgot our own nation. Today in two of my four classes the subject of Christianity came up. I forget why in the first class—in the second it was because I said I did not believe in celebrating Halloween when they asked. I had kids ask me about the Bible and what was in it. One girl said “I kind of feel bad because I am Christian and I have never read the Bible.” Cultural Christianity at work. Another said she reads a page in hotel rooms and that is it. Others wanted to know why they called Mary the Virgin Mary when she had a baby. That was a great question because I got to share about the Holy Spirit and Jesus’ birth. One girl stayed after class to ask me more questions about Jesus and why we give gifts ant Christmas.

And my heart broke. I have never ever met a group of kids so unchurched and clueless about the Lord. It isn’t their fault—and it is no wonder that their Instant Messenger profiles are filled with the F-word and when I read them a book about a 10 year old girl they perceive half her comments as sexual. It is sick—but they can’t help it. In my groups of students in Texas I had mostly church kids, of course. But I had a select group that was definitely anti-God and clueless. So shouldn’t it at least be REVERSED here? But it isn’t. I have a few kids who go to church. But I can’t think of ONE KID I can pinpoint as a serious Christian who really understand it. And it is heartbreaking.

I am not in a great position to make a difference. I sponsor no groups (I tried but it didn’t work out). I don’t have a way to get these kids to church—too far away. So it is hard because answering a few questions in class won’t save anyone. They know I am different but they don’t REALLY get it. Maybe it is some sort of lame little seed I am planting, but boy do I feel useless!

This is our next generation—all freshmen in my classes. Average age 14.

Meanwhile even our SCHOOL is having a Halloween contest on Halloween. They encourage the celebration. I am not coming to work that day—I battle enough spirits on an ordinary day!

Anyway, all else is relatively calm. The holding pattern continues and I just want to get home. I am making no secret anymore about leaving—even at work. The kids know even that this is a one year job. Why pretend? And it helps me better to hang on.

Sometimes I look at this year thing, and it doesn’t feel like I going to be here the whole year, but if I am not that would probably mean breaking a lease and owing lots of money or being fired or some such awful thing—and I sure don’t want THAT to happen as much as I want to go home, so maybe that is just because I am ready to go now!

I have church tonight—that helps. And the rest of the calendar will go quickly but after Christmas it will be tough. Feb. 6 is a Shachah conference in San Diego so that will be helpful. The next weekend I have a long weekend so I plan to fly to Texas. Spring break is April 5-9 and then it is another more than two months before school is out. And THEN I have another month before I can come home! AHHH!!!!!!!!! But at least I can do stuff like sell my things and maybe work some part time jobs to make extra money to move.