Many years ago after my mom died, I sank into a deep depression. I don’t think I have ever felt so bad in my life. No pain could compare. Because I only had one mom and no dad, I will never experience anything that awful again, but it was truly agonizing. The entire depression lasted about a month. I came to a low point where I truly believed I was not going to be okay.

The thing that snapped me out of it was as silly as the coconut falling on Gilligan’s head and curing his amnesia. It was Easter weekend. My mom had died. I lived in a city where I knew few people because we had just moved to Texas the previous year. I had two friends I was close to, and we had endured agony together going through my mom dying.

And suddenly Easter came. They were with their families and I was alone in my apartment on Earlene Drive. And that ended the whole depression for me. That is what I mean by silly. It was like one second I was literally despondent and the next the rejection almost served as a catalyst for a cure. I was never that bad again. I did not get happy overnight, but it was like I woke up. I was on my own and so I could either sink into that and be loony, or I could get up and live without anyone. And that is what I did.

Not long after that my aunt Mary called, offering to help me pay summer tuition at college. I went back to school and went straight through until I had a bachelor’s degree, a master’s degree and a teaching certificate in two areas. I found a new church out of town, and I went into my own world with God for several months.

And now I feel the same. I cannot explain it but the adjustment and serious downs are over. I cannot tell you how I know that, but that I do. This was one of the most challenging periods I have had in a long time, but the coconut hit my head.

I put “Beautiful One” in my CD player on my way to work and set it on repeat. “Your Cross has spoken mercy over me...” Gush gush boo hoo. Me an God in our world. Out of that world will come something.

Do I sound cryptic? It’s only because I don’t plan ahead for God (although I would like to at times!). I came to work different today than yesterday. I feel it and I can’t verbalize it all, but I know it.