Home again. I might actually sleep in this house every night for three and a half weeks before I leave again (yeah, right). I checked out of my hotel and headed to find shoes and get lunch. I was driving through an office park in Carrollton and felt an urge to pull over. I figured it might be God, so I should. So I pulled around back, parked and prayed. I wasn’t there a terribly long time, and I can’t say I had deep revelation, but it was still good. I played “Hallelujah to the Lamb,” the song that God used in my major deliverance from smoking and other things 5 ½ years ago. And today a line hit me. I always remember That when I had my vision of Jesus and my deliverance that at the start of the song I was one way and by a certain line in the song I was another. I can never describe what happened exactly but just the point where I was already changed. The line says “ then all the nations will see your glory revealed and worship you.” It was the first time I realized what the power of the Cross was to people. I saw that picture under the Cross in my vision; it was an intense scene. And much later I realized that was also my call. It was not a deliverance for Susan to have healthy lungs, but it was a call to reveal His glory to the nations in whatever way he called me. And today when I heard that line in that parking lot it struck me because of what is happening now. All the nations in one place… Faces from every culture… and then not long after I was driving and realized something else. Last week as I was praying for the church in California, I had an intense moment where in my prayer I could see what could (would) happen there in that atmosphere. I was remembering that and thinking of it and then I told God this and wrote it down, too. I said, what I saw has to be real. That vision (okay I realize it sounds redundant to say vision and I certainly would not claim to have many; in fact, this would be number two that I have ever labeled as such, at least) MUST be reality because if it can’t happen in that place, where can it happen? And if it can’t happen there then all these years that I have believed in what happened to me, all the power and hope for others could just be stories. So I need it to be real. It was such a powerful moment of intercession that I sent it to Darrell in an email and Terry in the mail in case he did not print it for her. But of course I have not talked to them live since I left from my last trip, so I don’t know what they thought. But knowing them I am sure the reaction was positive and they believe the same thing. (Am I having visions and dreams now too? Interesting stuffI have been having happen!)

I went straight from lunch to Shachah for rehearsal. That is bittersweet. We have been learning the dances for the women’s conference for a few weeks now. Today I learned part of a dance I would be in, and I got it. Thank God whatever little dance attack I had a few weeks ago seems to have passed. Aunty knows what is going on, so I am doing as she says and learning all I can now. There are three more rehearsals between now and June and the last two of those three are both on days I will be in Los Angeles—although they are three weeks apart. After that the next one is not until August. By August everything will be different. I liked the dance—or maybe I just like that I learned it easily. We practiced outside in the heat. Yes, heat, close to 90. It reminded me of the practices last summer outside. ICK!

On my way home, I was listening to a CD and “Dance with Me” came on—the song I am dancing to in June in CA. I have been very careful to let the Lord choreograph it. No kidding—I would not have been able to do what He has done. It is done enough that if someone asked me to do it tomorrow I could, but there are a few holes I knew would come. Today a big one came as I drove home from Shachah. It was funny because I wrote it down as I drove and sort of walked it out with my hands an the music and saw how well it fit. The last part is something we just did at Shachah yesterday. Of course that is what dance is, taking different moves and putting them together, but this one was perfect. And when I envisioned it with the music, I said, “Wow, God, that is beautiful!” It really was—it sure was not my beautiful choreography. Sometimes when I see it in my mind it moves me. It is amazing how this stuff just comes. I want this whole song to be His. It is my love story with Him. There is so much to it. So now the only thing left at all is that last few seconds… I know something will come. The majority of the song came the first week—I still see myself in Darrell and Terry’s front yard doing pas be bourree piques that became a part of the song, and from that point on, the dance took shape. But those little parts I waited for, wait for, knowing God is faithful and on June 22 when I stand there at my old church and the music starts, it will literally be me dancing with Him.

Well, I am about to head for bed. 5 a.m. will be here all too soon! I made a long list in Dallas over the weekend—I call it “Confirmations, Affirmations and Encouragements” and it is a long list, things being added almost daily. It really seems so clear. This was not an intense weekend of prayer—prayer is always good, but at the same time, it was almost like it would have just been a ritual to act so holy about it all (though I should have prayed more just because I should!). I look at this list and see God has spoken. If I tried to make a list called “Slammed Door-imations, Not Supposed to Happen-imataions and Discouragements, I really don’t think I could. That in itself is telling.

Bon soir, mes amies.